I Was a Teenage…

May 31, 2011 § Leave a comment

I was a teenage flapjack.

Don't maple me angry

I remember always being greasy and sticky. Always! Although, I suppose those things are not so abnormal for teenagers. I had blemish-free golden brown skin regardless. That’s one reason behind my theory that I was part of some kind of sick experiment. The other reason had to do with the fact that I even reached teenage years.

Flapjacks are made to be enjoyed on Sunday mornings. We generally have a lifespan of 5 minutes. Unable to fulfill my life’s purpose, I developed a bit of an attitude problem (this is also not uncommon for teenagers, I’m told).

One time, I was in the freezer. The maple syrup was just starting to harden, so I forced the viscous liquid into makeshift arms. Next time I was removed from my icy prison, I thawed enough to punch my captors and escape for this interview.

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